Leap.

2017 is flying by, what have I achieved this year? What will you achieve?

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Taking a leap into something new is scary. For me, personally, new always equals “I’m not good enough yet, so I’ll just wait until I’m the best before actually trying out the new thing.” Which, quite frankly doesn’t make any sense, but for some reason it does to me. In 2017 I’ve taken a lot of leaps. Leaps into new friendships, leaps into/out of jobs, leaps into new skills, and leaps into new mediums of expression. If one thing during this post is to be the most true, leaping into anything new is not easy for me. At the beginning of the year I wrote down a list of ten things I wanted to achieve this year.

  1. Zero Debt
  2. More Money Saved.
  3. Start Wedding Planning
  4. Write More
  5. Find your brand.
  6. Budget each month
  7. Best shape of my life
  8. Find a new community
  9. New Camera
  10. New job.

Although we are a little more than half way through the year. Technically we are 66% through 2017, but I figured rather than writing a post about one specific trip, recipe, or experience, I’d do a little self-reflecting. Hopefully in the process, I can pass on some reflecting to all of you, as well!

So, how have I done? 

  • Zero Debt
  • More Money Saved. 
  • Start Wedding Planning 
  • Write More (I’d give myself a B-)
  • Find your brand.  
  • Budget each month
  • Best shape of my life
  • Find a new community 
  • New Camera 
  • New job

Woah! Over the past eight months I have been extremely diligent in my efforts, but rather than dwelling on the fact that I’ve smashed what I’ve set out to do, mostly, I’d like to take a second to harp on ‘why’ I set these objectives, specifically. Before moving on, I’d liked to address that creating objectives for the last 33% of the year, has not been as successful, but I’ll report back when I’ve come to a more clear conclusions as to what I want it to look like.

Each one of these objectives for 2017 are not mutually exclusive, and that’s what I truly love each of them and how they’ve impacted my 2017 thus far. 2017 has been extremely challenging and I’ve had to work harder than I ever have in my life to intentionally fulfill what I wanted. I’ve always seen myself as a person with strong work ethic, but putting intention behind my drive is truly why i feel a difference this year in contrast with years’ past. Rather than setting a bunch of goals that I hoped to achieve that I’ve been dragging along for years and years, I thought about how each goal could impact one another and my well-being to carry me forward while feeling empowered and positive (side note: I’ve had moments of pure struggle where empowerment/positivity was nowhere to be found, too)

There are a few things about me that not many people know. First, and foremost, I do not like being around a group of new people. I feel extremely uncomfortable and lose my confidence. These experiences make me feel numb, out of place, and truly scared. I have a tendency to say ‘no’ to things that make me uncomfortable, as I’m sure a lot of us do, but towards the end of 2016 I was allowing this characteristic/trait to take over and make those around me feel unhappy. Moving into the new year, saying ‘Yes’ made it’s way into many of the objectives found above. Saying ‘yes’ to taking control of my finances, saying ‘yes’ to fully diving into the deep end and finding a new community/friends, and saying ‘yes’ to finding a job that better fit my professional objectives.  For some, saying yes is easy, but I would challenge you. Are you saying yes because it’s shielding you from being vulnerable and taking charge, for the same reason that I was saying no?

Moving on (sorry for putting on the ‘i’m a therapist now’ hat for a second) other goals such as buying a new camera, diving into new forms of fitness, and finding my brand/writing more have allowed me to find new forms of expression. We all need to express ourselves, from time to time, and some more than others. My mediums of expression come from genuine and authentic conversation in my relationship, with close friends and family, and most often through cooking. However, 2017 was a year to find new muses and new modes. Photography has been a godsend, especially in the last two or three months since we’ve acquired our new Sony camera. It has truly established a new lens (pun intended) that has granted both Ryan and I a new perspective on our own lives. Writing, always a favorite of mine, is something of a lost art with our generation, and I highly encourage handwriting, there’s something about the digestion and completion of a thought on paper that elevates the medium from any other form of writing. And, last but not least, fitness, specifically new types of fitness such as weightlifting (I’m a big cardio guy) has opened new avenues of healthy living.

If you’re still reading this (I know this is a longer post), I challenge you to find a new medium. Whether it’s for health reasons, expression, or to lean into your vulnerabilities, or any other reason, do it. We are multi-faceted incredible beings, and we should explore all sides of ourselves. You’ll be surprised what you’re capable of.

I’ll end with a quote from some earlier writing back in June. I was sitting at work, extremely frustrated about the small mindedness of a certain individual, and I channelled that frustration into some positive writing.

“Don’t become like the rest of them. You have a caring soul. Hear the world cry, see the beauty, feel the balance. It is all here and it all deserves admiration.”

What will you leap into the last 33% of the year?

What do you want me to post about? Leave your comments below. Travel? Food? Style? Advice?

Next week, I’ve got some updates on my gardening and backyard project, stay tuned!

 

 

3 thoughts on “Leap.”

  1. Beautifully written & moving.

    Loved this: “For some, saying yes is easy, but I would challenge you. Are you saying yes because it’s shielding you from being vulnerable and taking charge, for the same reason that I was saying no?”

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks beautiful. Have to give a small shoutout to Kara, for that one. It’s not always easy to challenge the why or the intentions behind our actions, but it’s so important. You should read “Daring Greatly” by Brené Brown, it’s next on my list, and she talks about just this.

      Like

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